To succeed, you need to fail
We get used to fear mistakes still at school. If you were delivered to you, then you worse than all. You failed, lost and covered my name with disgrace. And it doesn’t matter what lesson you remove from this, I learned something new or not. With this approach to education it is not surprising that in adulthood we are all wildly afraid to make a mistake and disgrace.
Despite our fear, making mistakes is the usual component of any case. A series of correct and erroneous actions – this is the usual process of performing any task. But even if you recognize it, the fear of mistakes accompanying you from school bench, will not disappear anywhere.
Organic life on our planet itself is the result of samples and mistakes in the long process of evolution. Why should you move forward differently? Without failures, you will not be able to correct mistakes, change and become better. It turns out that the failure is a good thing.
Successful people are also mistaken
It is difficult to imagine that successful people are also mistaken that they also have failures and failures. But it is so, and the stories of the failures that some successful people share, only prove it.
- David Nyalman (David Neeleman), co-founder of the budget American airline Jetblue Airways, was dismissed from the post of vice president of Southwest Airlines. Rich experience of mistakes and achievements helped him create his airline.
- Wanda Sykes, a famous comedian, actress and writer, awarded the Emmy Prize, failed on stage before her name became famous.
- Howard Schultz, Chairman Starbucks, appealed to 240 investors, offering his vision of a modern European coffee shop, and 99% of investors refused to him.
- Jesse Jacobs, owner of the Samovar Tea Lounge Cafe network, went around 71 bank before received financing.
- Ben Zander (Ben Zander), Conductor of the Boston Philharmonic Orchestra, survived the failure at a very early age when his mother sent the composition of his essays to the art contest. When the results of the competition were announced, the judge said that the composition of Ben was so bad that he was not worthwhile to compose music.
Perceive life as a game
Video game developers constantly quote studies in which it turns out that players get the most pleasure from the game when they lose and try again.
Probably, you also remember these moments when, during the game in Tetris, the last block falls and the game ends or when Mario spends its last life and you click on "play again". Now you know more about this level and you are one step closer to his passage.
Your brain knows that this is a video game, and does not perceive the defeat as the reason to surrender. On the contrary, failure is perceived as a delightful interesting and exciting challenge. And you continue to play until the level will pass (or until you get bored).
We are developing through trial and errors, and there is no award better than overcoming defeat and decide, it would seem to be unreserved. The failure stimulates a person to move forward and gives him a chance to become better.
Failure teaches better than victory
Use failure as a tool for self-analysis and follow-up – this is a great life position, and many people use her opportunity. For example, paralympic and six-time world champion in wheelchairs Jeff Adams (Jeff Adams).
Jeff does not allow the disability to stand on the way of his love for sports, and the iron determination helps him to win Paralympic Games. Thanks to his failures, Jeff gained inner strain.
When I talk to students, I’m talking about races that lost. Because lesions teach me more. This is the time when I rarest.
One of the most significant lesions of Jeff occurred during the Summer Games in Barcelona.
I passed the last circle with two other guys, and something like something like: "Today my life will change. The last circle is obtained I have the best. I am on the finish line with two guys, and everything is given three medals. Success is guaranteed. But I made a mistake, insufficiently checking my gear.
Jeff’s chair broke in the last round, and he flew out of a stroller – face to racing track.
I lost. And the best day turned into the worst. We are accustomed to the fact that the main thing is victory. But maybe more importantly defeat and suffering, overcoming and courage? We do not attach this value as victories.
I won the race in Sydney, and it was a wonderful day. But what I learned? That it’s great when you have a wonderful day? This is the strangeness of life: you learn much faster when it is not easy when everything is not going smoothly.
Defeat is nothing but the result. It may not be what you hoped for, but this is a fact that cannot be changed. You can not fight with facts or hide from them.
Survive failure – it means to get information. This is a new fact for further work. Now you have learned something that they did not know before. Any results, good or bad, lead to new actions, supported by new information, with more thoughtful risks, and they all bring you to the goal.
Change the meaning of the Word
Let’s change the relationship to failures, I will change even the meaning of the word. That’s how we used to think.
1. Unwanted outcome of something, no success.
2. An unfavorable set of circumstances.
Synonyms: misfortune, bad luck, collapse, defeat, fiasco.
Let’s try to.
1. Critically important part of the growth and accumulation of experience.
Synonyms: personal growth, training, experiment.
Remember the circumstances of your life that you (now or at that moment) consider failure. Using the new definition of this word, create a list of failures from two columns. In the first will be directly the failures themselves, and in the second – what they have taught you.
Fill out both columns and see what you have learned thanks to your failures. At the same time, memories of failures still can cause you a storm of negative emotions. This is fine.
Just focus on what you learned thanks to these defeats. In what plan you grew after that? How has your life changed in a positive way? What are you doing now not as before? How do you develop and support self-confidence in order to try again?
In failures, as such, there is nothing wrong. Bad if a person does not know how to learn from his mistakes and grow thanks to such situations. This is a real failure.
Failures are part of life
Craig Brewer, director of such hits, like "vanity and movement" and "black snake moan", also believes that errors and failures are necessary for growth.
At the very beginning, Craig’s career with friends and family decided to create a cinema masterpiece. Refusing his work in favor of the dream and invested in the project its own savings, they began to create a great American film.
Did they succeed? Craig answers with a smile: "It was a complete failure. Need about 30,000 dollars to make this film. And I do not think that someday I take it for it. ".
And this failure was far from the last. It was the first failure on the long path of Craig.
We are all wrong. And quite often.
Fear of mistakes deeply sits in every person, but Craig found a way to deal with it. He believes that failures are part of life. Painful part that can be rude and dirty, but it is inevitable. So it must be just taken.
You know that you will play periodically. The only way to become better is to fail. So tolerate failure. Let this process go to her. Do not stop and do not postpone it, because with age will only be more painful.
If people do not want to experience this pain, they marry and harvest children, then they blame their families and circumstances, and in fact, they just don’t want to experience failures. So, if you want to achieve success, worry the failures.
How to find out what you are standing
Randii Wessen, a system engineer in the NASA jet movement laboratories, filed an application for participation in the Astronaut preparation program 15 times in a row. And he was not accepted.
In his documents there are letters with refusal from graduate school, internships, aerospace companies and even from the laboratory, where he is now working.
"You can find out what every person costs, by how he copes with problems, – says. – What do you do when you get a lousy assessment? What do when you get a refusal to university? What do when someone breaks with you? This is how you pull yourself out of trouble, it makes you stronger and really shows you what you are standing ".
He who challenges will risk playing. Who does not make it already lost.
Defeat is not the end of the story. In fact, it is not even defeat. Errors and epic failures are a useful tool that helps you follow your way. Risk. Play. Embarge.
If everything went wrong, as you thought if you fell face in the dirt, review your methods and try again. Failure is just the result, nothing more. This is a series of lessons that you need to learn to become the best version of yourself.